QUESTION & ANSWER WITH GURUDEV
POSTED ON: SUNDAY, DECEMBER 24, 2023
Q: How can I be a strong leader and also not hurt others' feelings?
Sri Sri Ravi Shankar:
You know, strength does not mean aggressiveness. Today, aggression is being misunderstood as a sign of strength, but it is not so. You can see that school children and college boys and girls feel that if they are aggressive, then they are leaders, and they are strong. No! I consider aggression as a sign of weakness. Anger is a sign of weakness.
You know, whatever is in your capacity, you do not get angry about it. What you cannot do, or when you find something difficult to do, only then you get angry, right? So, anger and aggression are not signs of heroism, they are signs of weakness.
This is what they mostly show in the movies — anger and aggression, and children get bombarded with these impressions and they think this is the way of life. We must change this, don’t you think so? Instead, friendliness and happiness should be signs of strength.
I would say, every child and every youth should make one new friend every day. Life is so short. There is not enough time to spread happiness, love and harmony. Why do we waste this time with aggression, anger and fight? Misunderstandings crop up, it is a normal and natural phenomena, whoever it is, maybe your best friends, there will be some misunderstanding. Between husband and wife, there will be some misunderstanding. Between parents and children, there are misunderstandings happening. Wisdom is to rise above it. We get so upset and angry because we don’t leave room for imperfections. We should leave a little room for imperfection.
You know, you keep a garbage can at the house so that you can put any garbage in the can. Suppose you think there should be no corner for the garbage can at home, do you know what will happen? There will be garbage everywhere, in the whole house! So, this is why we must leave some space for imperfections. If someone is imperfect, just accommodate them. In due course of time, they’ll change. This will increase your tolerance level. You know, today, this is what we lack very seriously. People are becoming less and less tolerant. Look at the older generation, how calm and tolerant they are. And look at the other generation - how intolerant they are becoming! This is the case all over the world: in the East, West, North, and South, everywhere.
See how Montreal was 30 years ago when I came, and how it is now? There is a big difference, isn't it? Crime is increasing and the reason for crime is lack of tolerance.
I heard about an incident in Mexico. There were two taxi drivers and they got into an argument at the traffic light. They got out of their cars, took their guns and shot each other, while the passengers were sitting in the taxi! I thought, my God, this is too much. So, we started a program in Mexico and I tell you, it has transformed so many thousands of lives. Now, the Government of Mexico has asked us to teach 150,000 students. I happened to meet several of the Senators, the Congressmen of Mexico, and they all want the Happiness Program in their county. Now we need more teachers.
Gurudev Sri Sri Ravi Shankar